Monday, January 30, 2012

What do I say?


It's been more than a year and a half since I last posted, and frankly, I don't know what i want to write now, either. So many blogs go silent after frenetic posting for some time. I sometimes wonder why. Is it because we run out of things to say? Or is it that we cannot sometimes share what we really want to say? Or do we lose that drive within us that pushes us to write, to share, to let the world know?

I don't know. All I know is that the last two years were very stressful and packed with so much to do, that I just lost the interest to write and maintain the blog. Besides, what is there for me to say? I don't have any defined topics, I am not writing on any particular subject, just random thoughts and experiences, and they sometimes dry up.

Sometimes, when you are focused on something, you exclude everything else. That is what happened to me. I was so focused on helping my daughter through school, and into college, that everything else came second. Now that she has cleared another peak (her XII Boards), and is doing extremely well in first year in college,and no longer needs me the way she did earlier, I am suddenly faced with the question - what do I do now?

For the past so many months I have been contemplating this question. I realize that sometimes the dreams you had for yourself as a young person, no longer appeal to you. I am in a kind of limbo, not inclined to accept the things that come my way and yet unsure of what I should do. Maybe I have to go through the limbo, maybe I just have to wait for the answer to come...

10 comments:

Haddock said...

some times a break is a wecome change. In this case it was motivated by some other need.
That pic is apt for the post.
The road showing the way ...... you standing at this end and showing the way for your daughter, you keep put but make sure that she is going in the right direction :-)

Meena said...

Thank you, Haddock:)

RamMmm said...

Congrats on your daughter.

True, priorities change at different times and so do the interests. Maybe now you'll find time to pen something and surely you'll find a subject or a context.

HariPuttar said...

Meena - great piece!

You've captured the dilema of growing up and growing out of priorities in life. This happens to most of us. As priorities change so does our focus. As you start to de-focus you will concurrently feel restless and tired. Don't let that distract you and compel you to do something unpleasant. Take your time to explore your next priority in life!

Till then YOU should be the priority.

Thats exactly what I did back in 2008 when we became empty nesters. Around the same time I decided to get out of active corporate life and chose Health and Nutriton as my focus. It has brought a balance in not only my life but also in the people around me.

Till then keep writing, something that comes very natural to you.

Meena said...

HaiPuttar, thank you! I am indeed finding things to do, and with me as the focus, as you suggest! i guess it is so ingrained in us to be parents that we sometimes forget to do things for ourselves. Takes a while to get out of that!

Vishwa said...

Yes...sometimes you find nothing specific to write. But the random thoughts and experiences...they themselves form a coherent whole when written down...and a flow arrives. Are we writing a literary novel here :-).....? I sometimes write down gibberish....and the blogpost writes itself!!

Congratulations on your daughter's achievements!!!

Please let loose your random thoughts....I'm sure they'll form a very readable post and touch someone...!

Pradeep KN said...

Hi Meena - came across your blog again after a long time - it is an excellent blog - you write so well - why did you stop writing? Can we expect you to continue soon .......... waiting .......... Latha Lokanath Pradeep

Vishwa said...

Hi Meena....nice to see that you're still active in the blog world. Your comment on my blog felt like a visitation from a long known friend :)
Wishing you a speedy contact with your muse. Pls write.

Meena said...

Hi Latha! I hope so too!

Meena said...

Hi Latha! I hope so too!